


The Things I Could Do Without

by eri_quin



Category: Karate Kid (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Genderbending, Multi, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-24
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-22 22:16:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6095722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eri_quin/pseuds/eri_quin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Mike Barnes seeks revenge some other way, Danielle LaRusso finds healing in two unlikely and unexpected saviors. John Kreese and Terry Silver suffer some guilt in association, and take her in as they deal with the aftermath of what happened to her and she deals with it and interacting with them.</p><p>But old wounds open up and it isn't an easy journey to recovery for any of them.</p><p>John Kreese/fem!Daniel/Terry Silver, with triggery undertones and PTSD.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Tears For Fears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Non-descript non-consensual sex (trigger warning) and some violence. Also genderbent Daniel because I'm obsessed with genderbending.

Mr. Miyagi was dead. She…she hadn't expected that to happen. Not so soon after she had won the All-Valley Tournament again, and had defended her title with his help. He had seemed fine then. They had trained together, and he hadn't looked ill at all.

What was she going to do now?

She had lived with him, had become just as much a daughter to him as he had become a father to her. She had opened a bonsai store with him. She had…she had done so much with him.

What was Danielle LaRusso without Keisuke Miyagi?

Danielle was all alone now. Her mother was taking care of Danielle's uncle, and Mr. Miyagi was gone. Ali was in UCLA. She had no other friends or family. So where did that leave her? What was she going to do? Where was she going to go? Could she still stay at Mr. Miyagi's?

The rain poured down on her and the grave she stood over. Her eyes tried to blink the raindrops away, as she clutched onto the flag they had given her after Mr. Miyagi had been given a military funeral in honor of his service in the army.

Sniffling, she moved away from the grave and headed to her car, forgoing her usual yellow convertible for one of the others that she'd helped clean up and would better reflect her somber attitude in its dark colors. She got in and gently placed Mr. Miyagi's folded flag onto the seat next to her. She took a moment in the car, just sitting there and staring out the windshield.

Sighing, she shook her head and finally went to start the car. However, a loud bang against her window startled her and she looked out it to see a familiar, unwanted face.

Mike Barnes sneeringly smiled outside her window and she was too tired to deal with him and his games.

Rolling down her window a crack, she gave him a tired look. "What do you want, Barnes? I don't want to deal with you right now."

"Oh, you're going to deal with me right now," he growled and there was something off in his expression, something not right in his eyes.

A horrible feeling settled in the bottom of her stomach, and she felt the instinct to run scream at her. Something wasn't okay with him and she had to get as far away from him as he could. Reaching out to start her car, she panicked as Mike wrenched the door opened and yanked her out of the car and threw her onto the grass.

"What are you doing?!" she shrieked.

"You cost me everything!" he shouted at her.

He reached down to grab her, but she slapped his hands away and got up, taking off from there with a burst of speed. She ran through the cemetery, feet unwillingly pounding onto graves and dodging headstones of the dead. There was a line of trees ahead of her that formed the beginning of the forest surrounding the area. As she heard Mike's heavy steps behind her and feeling like he was catching up (but not daring to look), Danielle ran towards the trees.

She burst through the tree line and into the cover of the forest, making her way into it and getting deeper and deeper.

"Keep running! I'll get you!"

His yell hadn't sounded too far behind her, and she wanted to put more space between them. She had to. She knew if she didn't, something terrible would happen. She wasn't confident enough to fight him, and her fear blinded her anyway. More than of her opponents before, Mike Barnes had always unnerved her.

Johnny and his group had been jerks, but Mike was something else that chilled her to the core.

In a clearing in the forest, she felt herself get tackled to the ground. She screamed and landed on her front, struggling to get Mike off of her. She felt horrible pain as he slammed her head against the ground, making her dazed. Whatever he had planned, she wasn't going to let him go through with it. She'd fight tooth and nail before she'd let Mike win over her.

"If it hadn't been for you, I would have gained so much," he snarled at her, flipping her onto her back, though he had trouble doing so because she wouldn't quite struggling. "I was going to be rich. I was going to have it all! But you…"

His hands enclosed around her throat and he started choking her. She scratched at his hands, trying to pry them off, but he had a strong grip. She coughed erratically as he unexpectedly let go, but instead reached down to her black dress and started to pull it up.

That made her panic and scream, jerking a knee up to hit him with it to keep him away. But he only caught it and pushed away, yanking her dress over her knees and exposing herself.

"So fucking uppity! Think you're too good for me? Rejecting me every single time! Well, I'll show you what you were missing out on!"

Danielle lashed out and smacked his face, landing a good hit that ended up bruising his face that she hoped would look worse later. It just agitated him and he hit her back, dazing her again, and went back to choking her, though he used one hand and wasn't too tight.

Then he pushed in and she cried out.

Danielle felt herself become numb and the fight drain out of her, and she stared up at the sky blankly as she ignored Mike's presence and what he was doing to her. The pain she felt became a cloudy thing as she blocked it out, feeling only tears slide down her cold, numb face.

The sky was gray and the rain pelt down on her softly, mixing in with her tears.

When he finished, he grunted and pulled himself away and got up from her. He looked down at her and she wondered if he was going to finish her off. Instead, he scoffed and walked away and she was left there in the rain.

She felt completely empty.

Danielle couldn't find it in her to make herself get up, to do something. To get help. No, she lay on the forest ground as if she really had died and the gray skies above her was as lifeless as she was. She felt cold and alone.

There was no Mr. Miyagi to magically heal her this time.

She finally let out a sob, feeling the emotion finally well up in her and erupt. She cried for a few moments before forcing herself to turn over. Dirt smudged her skin and dug under her nails as her fingers clawed inward at the ground. Taking a second, she then slowly pushed herself up and then stumbled through the forest to try to find her way back.

She didn't have a sense of time or place, and her surroundings blurred around her and looked all the same. It seemed like it took forever for her to reach an end to the forest, where she dragged her feet onto the road. She wasn't near the cemetery.

Staggering to the middle of the road, she just stared off blankly and wished she could have protected herself better.

She had learned to protect herself, to fight back. Why couldn't she have this time?

Danielle heard a car approaching from behind her and turned slowly, hearing it screech to a stop. She squinted, trying to see who it was. But all she felt was exhaustion and a dull ache.

She passed out then, and fell to the floor with a quiet thud.

* * *

Between he and Terry, the two of them pulled together enough. Somehow, John had managed to scrounge up students from somewhere and Terry was still rich and in business. All in all, despite the loss of their "star pupil" Mike Barnes against that effortlessly annoying Danielle LaRusso, they'd managed to pull through and retain something of a win from it all.

It wasn't the revenge he wanted, but he wasn't as hopeless and depressed as he had been. And after everything had been said and done, the attempted revenge scheme had cooled his anger and grudge and he decided that had made things settled and equal in the end. Really, she'd suffered a bit, and it was enough for him. He never really liked picking on women either, so he felt that he was glad to finally wash his hands of all this.

And, well, for the second time in a row, she'd been something of an amazing thing to watch. It made him wish that he had snatched her up a long ago, to be his own student. And, as much as it still irked him to be beaten by the guy, he'd grudgingly admit that Miyagi had been more than a good opponent, even when he was up against him and Terry together. To say that he had to admit being impressed by the pair was something that would probably have to be pried from him.

"That guy died today," Terry said, sounding rather disappointed. John didn't need the name to know who he was talking about.

If he knew his old comrade, he was probably disappointed at the lack of opportunity to approach that old man for a rematch, until Terry could finally best Miyagi. He would have wanted that opportunity too. There wasn't many who could defeat them so easily and be such a challenge, and it had been a surreal change. An unwelcome one at first, but now it had wet their appetite to fight again, and even improve themselves. Keep away the stagnancy they had been wallowing in.

"Want to pay your respects?" Terry asked this time, wearing a wide grin, and John looked at him in amusement.

Still, why not? He had been, in hindsight, a great opponent. He was dead too, and there really was no point in beating a dead horse down, and their energy might as well be wasted in that endeavor. They could, now that that slope was dead, be a little more admitting to their respect and call their truce a little more real.

And, though they hadn't known until Terry had snuck into the old man's house, they were all military men. They had served in their army, for their country, and been in horrific wars. That they could at least really respect him for, and with his death, properly give him the respect for it.

He wondered if the old slope remembered bombings, burnt, emaciated bodies and shouting Germans the way he couldn't stop remembering flamethrowers, chemical sprays, and violent, slanted-eyed, untrustworthy people hiding in tall grasses…

"So?" his friend asked him.

"Yeah…yeah. Let's go," John answered gruffly.

That's why the two of them found themselves at a grave, freshly buried, on a rainy afternoon.

"To you, you old bastard," Terry raised up an imaginary bottle. "I would've eventually beat you to the ground!"

John scoffed. "Yeah right," he dodged the swat to his head, and grinned at Terry before turning his grin to the grave. "Never would have imagine us here, huh, slope? Hell, for a slope…you weren't half bad, eh?"

His grin faltered. "You left us behind and not even able to get a real, proper fight out of you, old man." A thought entered his head. "And what about your pupil? How about leaving her behind?"

He wondered what happened to her and what was she currently doing?

Shaking his head, they finished up there, silent as they watched the grave. And then John saluted it, surprising Terry, who (after a moment) followed suit. The man had a Medal of Honor. He knew the custom, even if John had a higher rank than the other.

And to be honest, the old slope had his respect either way. He had been a good enemy and he had been a fellow soldier.

"The world is fucked anyway," he muttered as he put down his hand.

"Isn't it?" Terry hmmed. "Let's get out of here."

They made their trek back to Terry's car, where they began to drive off. It was only when they were on a more isolated road away from the cemetery, where they got the scare of their lives. A girl, bedraggled and looking like she'd been dragged through the forest next to the road, stood in the middle of it. Terry hit the brakes when they were nearer, especially when it seemed like she wasn't paying attention to them or going to move from her spot anytime soon.

Stopped in front of her, they warily sat there in shock. They became even more shocked as the girl turned to face them, and squinted to try to see them.

Of all the people, the girl in front of them was none other than Danielle LaRusso.

Started 1/20/16 – Completed 1/23/16


	2. The World Was Silent

They stared a moment before John jumped out of the car and rushed to the girl.

"Fuck, fuck, Terry," John reached for her neck and felt for a pulse. It was steady and there, but she was cold –almost icy to the touch.

"Is she breathing?" Terry yelled out as he restarted the car.

"Yeah," John affirmed, scooping her into his arms and then running back to the car.

He felt something drip down his arm from her, but the rain was just starting to stop and it couldn't be the rain from the angle. He looked down and saw blood and he cringed, remembering the state they saw her in.

_She was standing there still as a statue, just staring at them. Her black dress was torn and roughed up at places, and her face looked like she'd been smacked around a few times._

_Her legs trembled and she fell to the ground._

"You got her, John?" Terry asked as he started driving.

John gave a grunt, adjusting the girl in his arms and keeping a general hold on her as he sat uncomfortably on the seat.

"I've got her," he held tight as Terry raced down the road. "Are you heading to the hospital?"

"Of course I am," Terry said. He looked over and saw the dubious look John gave him. "Hey, man! I can be heartless, but I'm not _that_ heartless! Whatever grief we have with her doesn't mean I'd just leave her or dump her somewhere."

John winced. "I know. Sorry…Just…we _do_ have a lot of grief with her. I don't want that to fuck up our thinking about this kind of thing, you know?"

"Don't be an ass," Terry scowled, pushing down on the pedal more to hurry it up. "I ain't going to be an asshole to her when whatever happened to her happened. And that Jap mentor of hers just died –we know he was important to her. That makes us more than assholes to treat her like shit after, I guess, his funeral."

John had never felt right instigating the fight with her again, with this whole stupid business about that tournament. Or the first time around, when he'd pushed his ex-students to defeating her at all costs. But it had been his pride and teachings versus her and that slope.

Fuck, when did everything go wrong and get so complicated?

"I never even touched her," Terry huffed, continuing. "That's why I hired that kid for –Barnes was supposed to beat her down in the tournament. We had a sound strategy –shitty and messed up, but it was sound and legal enough! Basketball does it all the time, intentional fouling and hell!"

"I don't think it's the same," John muttered, tightening his hold on the girl as Terry made a sharp turn into a more civilized and populated area.

"You didn't touch her either, right? You went after the teacher, yeah –but that's teacher to teacher! You left her for your students to go up against in the tournament."

"Stop panicking and ranting and get to the hospital!" John snapped at him.

"I'm trying!" Terry shouted back. "But if you haven't noticed, we've got a girl who looks like she was attacked in your arms right now!"

"I noticed," John was muttering again. "Just get there."

Terry did, running a few red lights and driving too fast for the speed limit and cutting cars repeatedly. With no time to spare, they were finally in front of the hospital, and thankfully closer to the Emergency Room part of it. They both rushed out of the car and then headed towards the entrance of the ER, where Terry shouted out for help.

Seeing the injured and passed out girl in John's arms, a stretcher was quick to be brought to them and they took her from John and slowly lowered her onto the stretcher, laying her out. They started wheeling her away and then it was just John and Terry, and they traded disturbed looks with each other.

"We, uh, take a seat?" Terry asked him.

"I guess so," John said uneasily.

They found seats to the side and isolated themselves, preparing for a long wait there and wondering what the hell had just happened.

It was an hour later when they were found and greeted by a doctor, and they stood up from their seats to meet him.

"Are you family of the young girl that was brought in?" he asked tiredly, gray eyes matching the gray at the man's hair at his temples.

"No," John answered for the two of them. "We found her standing in the middle of the road near St. Andrew's Cemetery. She collapsed and we brought her here. We do know her though."

"I see," the doctor muttered. "I'm Dr. Rosier. You say you know her? Do you know her name and if she has any family around that can be contacted about this?"

"Her name is Danielle LaRusso," John answered that at least. He hesitated. "As for family…"

"Her mother is living out of town and taking care of Danielle's uncle," Terry interrupted. "Up until now, she'd been living with a family friend, but today was his funeral."

The doctor looked surprised. "Is that so? So there's no one around currently that can come for her and help?"

John and Terry looked at each other.

"We could…the two of us…" Terry was cautious to finish off their shared thought.

"We're familiar enough with her, and she should know us enough," John cut in and that was true enough. If maybe not for the right reasons, the three of them were definitely familiar with each other enough.

"Well, she looks young, so she'll definitely need a guardian or at least someone to have medical Power of Attorney over her," Dr. Rosier informed them. "If her mother can't come, we'll need to contact her to fax over some forms and have her assign one to Miss LaRusso, even if temporary. There are certain tests we'd like to perform on her, and we need a guardian's signature. The sooner the better, really."

"I have her mother's current number," Terry said suddenly, and John made himself not look over at his friend in surprise. How the hell did Terry know that?

So Terry wrote it down for the doctor, and John had to speak out about one last thing.

"Can we know what happened to her? Like can we know her injuries?"

Dr. Rosier hesitated. "I can't give you full disclosure until we've obtained her mother's permission, but I can give you a small list of her injuries. We don't have the full story of what happened to her until she tells it, though we can deduce most of it from the injuries she'd obtained. We can't tell you that until later on, but I can say she's got a mild concussion, and mostly just a lot of bruises."

"She was bleeding though," John thought the list of injuries was off. "I felt it all over my arm earlier."

Dr. Rosier shook his head. "I'm sorry, but that I can't tell you yet."

He finished up with them and then headed back to see his patient, while John and Terry were left in the ER's waiting room again.

"How'd you know her mother's number or where she was?" John turned to Terry, deciding to find an answer to something he could actually find out about.

"I researched all about Danielle and her situation and life before approaching her," Terry raised an eyebrow. "I treated the whole revenge thing like a mission."

"You recon the girl?" John asked in amusement.

"Well, I wasn't just going to go into this blindly, huh? You were more familiar with her and all than I was," Terry snorted.

"Yeah, well, I wish we could have recon this and be able to assess the whole situation right now, and not be so blind about things at the moment," John grumbled, taking a seat again.

"God, I wish we knew more about this," Terry echoed him, though he slumped more on the chair. "I don't like flying blind."

Unfortunately though, that was exactly what they were doing until they got more information, which didn't seem like it was going to happen anytime soon.

Thankfully though, by nightfall, the hospital had contacted Lucille LaRusso (who was upset that she couldn't just rush over and help her baby, given there was no one to take care of her incredibly sick brother) and had reluctantly given permission for Terry Silver (who had the money and stability to take over as temporary guardian) to sign the papers. There had been a lot of calls and faxing back and forth, but closer to midnight, everything had been settled for the most part.

"Now that you are in charge of her," Dr. Rosier started, and the two men straightened up. "The injuries, as I told you, were just that. However, the problem earlier not discussed until the patient confidentiality could be waived by your new rights, is the fact that we've come across conclusive evidence that she was raped. She's still unconscious, but as soon as she's awake, we'd like to have your permission to perform a rape kit as soon as possible. The sooner we can collect evidence, hopefully the faster we can identify the perpetrator. Or, if she knows who he is, be able to charge him and use the evidence collected against him."

John stood still then, and he was sure that Terry was the same. That hadn't occurred to either of them. And thinking of it now, it seemed such a strange and unbelievable thing to happen to the girl, because she was usually so headstrong and tough on her own.

"I," Terry started, but then had to stop and clear his throat. "I'll sign whatever. Do you need her to be awake to do it?"

"Preferably," Dr. Rosier told them. "Especially as we'd also like to get her permission."

When John wanted Danielle to pay and to make her suffer, this…this had never been a consideration. This was never, in any way, a possible route.

Damn it all, how the hell did this happen? Who had done this?

Dr. Rosier talked a few more things with them, but he left them in somber silence and the two men sat back heavily onto their chairs.

"Don't I feel like a bastard," Terry murmured to him. "We were all set and determined to make her suffer, and now she is…"

"This was never an option," he snapped at him. "We beat her in a tournament. We beat her in karate. We did things dirty and messed with her head a little, but we don't fuck up women like this. Or anyone outside the rules of the fight we make sure to be set up as obvious."

Terry shrugged. "I know. But it's not changing that, after everything and now this, that I feel like a real cad for doing what we did and wanting what we did, now that this…"

John flinched. He didn't want to think about it. Back in Vietnam, any soldier under his command that had been forceful with a woman (even if the women had been Vietnamese and _especially_ if they had been on their side of the war), he'd beat them down and made sure that they learned their lesson.

"I don't want to think about it right now, Terry," John murmured. "Just…just keep quiet and wait for her to wake up. If you want to apologize, try to declare a truce or give a peace offering, wait for her to wake up for it, will you?"

They collapsed into silence again, only to have a nurse come out half an hour later and inform them that Danielle had woken up and that they could see her. They were warned that she may not react positively to other men, but they could try to approach her calmly.

Led to her room, they saw her awake but staring at the ceiling blankly.

"Hello, Miss LaRusso," the nurse greeted the girl kindly. "I have two guests for you, if you're up to seeing them. They're the ones who found you –Mr. Silver and Mr. Kreese."

Maybe it would have been better if she'd freaked out and started panicking that they were there, but instead she showed no recognition of their names and continued to stare blankly.

"I'll just be outside," the nurse whispered to them and left.

John and Terry gave each other looks and then hesitantly move closer.

"So, I'm still waiting on that rematch," Terry forced cheer into his voice. "Weren't you going to kick my ass for being a 'no-good, lying, sack of bad apples'?"

She stayed silent.

John sighed and pulled a chair closer to her bedside. Terry did the same and they kind of sat there, unsure why they were and what in the hell were they doing.

"I suppose you want to say this is karma," she caught them off guard as she whispered that.

But they caught her meaning and both of their expressions darkened.

"No," John stood and purposely moved over her (slowly though) and blocked her view.

Her eyes finally focused in on him, but there still wasn't much inflection in her eyes or face.

"There are lines that should never be crossed," John told her firmly. "This is something that I will never condone."

"Ever," Terry added seriously.

When she finally acknowledged them, it was with a small nod that showed that she still hadn't been beaten completely yet.

"First things first, we're going to have to update you on a few things," Terry continued. "As of late yesterday, early this morning, I'm your new temporary guardian until either your mother comes back or you turn 18. Whatever comes first. Second, that means you'll be living with me for a time. John lives there too, just so you know. Any questions?"

"What about Mr. Miyagi's house?" she asked quietly, struggling to sit up. John moved to help her, noticing her slightly tensing.

"I don't actually know," Terry frowned. "I'll have to find out, but I could make sure it won't be bought off or anything in the meantime."

Before she could say anything in reply, the doctor came in.

"Oh good! Miss LaRusso, you are awake. I'm Dr. Rosier. A few things first –though I hate to rush you and just spring this one on you, it really is best to follow procedure and get it done as soon as possible, especially to keep from losing evidence. You don't have to press charges with the police, but it's best if you undergo a rape kit so that you'll always be able to have the evidence preserved, should you choose to press charges anytime later on."

"Okay," Danielle said reluctantly. "But I don't want to press charges."

Her answer caught the other three's surprise, and John and Terry definitely gave each other looks.

"Very well," the doctor conceded. "We have the dress you were wearing contained in a bag for evidence, but there are other samples we'd like to collect. I'll have Nurse Jackie do it, so you can be more comfortable." Dr. Rosier glanced at the men there with him. "If you would like these two gentlemen to accompany you…" though he sounded dubious.

"Okay," she said again, though this time she said it more dully.

Though surprised she was letting them come along, they weren't sure what was going on in her head.

They moved to another room where she was laid down. John and Terry stood behind her, away from where the nurse would be and where they couldn't see anything. Soon enough, Nurse Jackie came and told them the procedure.

"Spread your legs, sweetie, alright? We'll get started."

Though the hospital gown went over her knees, it was kept high enough (especially since her legs had to be spread apart) for the nurse to start taking pictures of the area in between them. The nurse then began to swab for samples, and John didn't think this would be so invasive. Or so clinical and practically dehumanizing.

It took hours too, which added to the clinical handling of the girl that was silent near them.

Afterwards, they were escorted back to her room, where she curled into a ball on her bed and ignored everything and everyone.

Silence once again dominated the room.

Started 1/25/16 – Completed 1/26/16


	3. Checked Into Rehab

She was quiet. It freaked him out, to be a little honest. The girl he remembered had been a riot to be around, back when she hadn't a clue of Terry's real motivations for "training" her. While they'd trained, he'd gotten a sense of her dorky wit and had enjoyed her charm while it had lasted.

The girl sitting in the back of his car, quiet as a mouse, wasn't the same girl he remembered.

Glancing to his side, he saw John tiredly watching out of his window, refusing to look anywhere else. Guilt seemed to have struck his friend back (it had him too), but unlike Terry who was trying to make things somewhat cheerier and better for everyone, John seemed to have withdrawn into himself in almost the same way Danielle had.

"So, it's just John and me in the house, though Snake and Dennis live there –they come in and out whenever though, 'cause you know –teenagers," he knew he was rambling. "If you don't remember them, they're the, uh, boys that were hanging around Barnes."

A flinch.

Terry paused, watching her through his mirror for a moment. He knew he hadn't imagined that. As soon as he'd mentioned Barnes, she'd…she'd _flinched_. Without consciously doing so, he'd slammed his foot on the brake, causing the car to jolt into a stop on top of the hill that led to his mansion. He heard John cursing, but he was too focused on the girl at the back of the car, who had nearly flown off her seat as well at the stop.

"What the hell, Terry?!" John cursed at him, but Terry ignored him.

"Did Barnes do it?" he felt his gut clenching horribly as he stared at her.

She whimpered and curled up into a ball, clutching her hands over her ears. Oh fuck.

"Did he –" his voice sounded nearly hysterical and had gone to a higher pitch.

A hand gripped his shoulder tightly and he looked at John, who shook his head and glared at him. Terry glanced back at Danielle, who was doing her best to block out the world, and then back at his friend, who was giving him a steady glare. Cursing under his breath, he put the car back in drive and began to continue on to his home.

But fuck. This was his fault. _He'd_ brought that kid in on this! He was the one who'd found Barnes, who'd given him a deal, and had made him all a part of this thing. What was the kid thinking? Why the hell would he do something like this?

Where was Barnes anyway? He hadn't seen him since a little after the tournament, where he'd all but kicked the kid out of the house for his failure.

Parking in front of the mansion, he stepped out and watched as John did too. Danielle was slower to leave though, and they waited for her patiently. She walked around the car and then stared up at the mansion, showing some emotion as she looked at it in awe. Pride and a bit of smugness filled him up, though inwardly he was relieved that some emotion came out of her, especially a more positive one.

"So you get to live in here for a while," Terry bounced a little on the balls of his feet, grinning slightly. "Want the grand tour?"

"I'd like to go straight to sleep," she said quietly, and his grin faltered.

"Okay," John cut in. "We'll show you where you sleep, and you can sleep for the night. Breakfast is…whenever. We sleep in pretty late, and neither of us really cook. We scrounge up something, or get something out."

"John cooks a little," Terry added. "But only some stuff. Little, easy stuff. 'Cause you know –bachelors."

A small smile briefly appeared on her lips, which Terry straightened up at and felt relieved again at seeing.

"Come on then," Terry led the way.

It was actually almost a long stretch from the front of his mansion to up the stairs then down the hallway of his second floor, where he reached a room that was across from John's and next to his. He told her that too, so she'd know where their rooms were, and she nodded and disappeared behind her door. And then he and John were disappearing in his room and frowning at each other.

"That kid did this!" Terry hissed angrily. "I fucking set that kid on her, and look where it led to!"

"Don't think it's your fault," John scowled at him. "Besides, if it's anyone's fault, it's mine. I was the one who agreed to this stupid revenge shit, egged you on, and started this whole thing."

"Don't forget that I suggested it and technically started and pushed you into it," Terry disagreed. "And _I_ was the one who hired that idiot. I didn't think he'd go this far though! What was he thinking?"

"I don't care or want to know why. He did it and it's already come to pass. What's important now is what to do with her, and where he is and how to get him to pay up for it," John said firmly.

"Maybe Snake or Dennis will be around tomorrow. I told them about all this, so they won't be caught off guard if they see her around and won't freak out or act like jerks when they see her. They might know where Barnes has been or even seen him lately."

"Do you think…" John hesitated. "Do you think she'll be okay? Here? With _us_?"

Terry wasn't sure of that himself. How could she? They had been two of her tormentors not too long ago, and now she was stuck around them. She'd been raped, and that in itself was messed up. Adding in that she'd been raped by the kid that the two of them had been training to beat her mercilessly in that tournament, that he'd hired to harass her before…

And that wasn't including the fact that Terry himself had led her on, pretended to care about her and become her friend, earning her trust and then betraying it when he finally exposed himself and the whole plot to her.

He just…Right now, Terry just felt like the biggest shittiest person in the world then.

"I don't know, John," he told the other man tiredly. "I really just don't know."

It wasn't supposed to be like this. It really wasn't.

* * *

John scratched his head as he yawned, lazily taking two steps at a time down the stairs as he headed for the kitchen. At the entrance, though, he had to pause and just watch in surprise.

He hadn't expected to see Danielle up so early, and cooking breakfast at that.

"Morning," he greeted hesitantly, and he watched her tense and turn her head to see him.

"Morning," she quietly greeted back before going back to her cooking.

He thought that was that and had started to debate with himself on whether or not he should go back to his room and wait until she was finished there in the kitchen, when she spoke up again.

"There's pancakes on the counter," she told him without looking at him. "I'm finishing sausages and eggs."

After an awkward pause, John nodded before he remembered she couldn't see him.

"…Thanks," he said gruffly, heading over to the pile of pancakes he finally saw.

He got himself a plate and nabbed a few of the pancakes, finding butter to slather on. He took quick discreet glances at her, but she either didn't notice or said anything.

"You, uh, cook?" he continued to be hesitant, but he was doing his best to be civil and draw her out of her shell.

"I lived with just my mother for the longest time. She went to work early and came home late," she said after turning off the stove and carefully putting what she finished onto a separate plate. "I learned to cook."

He took a sunny side up egg and a few sausages, and then sat down at the island counter in the middle of the kitchen. He was caught off guard that she chose to follow suit with her own plate, sitting across from him. For a few moments, it was just the two of them and they ate silently. And then, unable to help himself, he tried to get her to talk.

"Do you…do you want to talk about it? About Barnes –"

"No," she cut in sharply, face hardening a little as she stabbed into a sausage and glared lightly at her plate.

He swallowed helplessly. For another moment, there was silence again. Then he took a deep breath.

"When I was in Vietnam, there were a lot of things that happened that I still dream and think about," he started quietly, and he saw he'd grabbed her attention. "I have a scar on my right shoulder, where a Viet Cong soldier snuck up on me and stabbed me. We struggled a while, before I managed to kill him with his own knife…but that was the first time I'd ever killed someone up close and saw them die right before my eyes. He was just a kid, you know? A teenager. He was a little younger than you."

He never talked in detail about what happened in Vietnam. The few times he spoke about it, he'd been vague enough, and only enough to impart the importance of his teachings to his students.

John still had trouble forgetting his time there after all, and trying to forget about it was what he usually did.

But he thought that it might help getting her to talk if he talked too. So if he shared his hell, maybe she'd share hers.

"I didn't want to move here," Danielle spoke up, and he focused on her, letting out the breath he'd been holding after his last word. She wasn't talking about what happened, but at least she was talking about something. "I was fine in New Jersey, but I wasn't happy here. But then again, New Jersey wasn't great either. I didn't have friends there. I don't know…maybe I just can't get along with people. Maybe that's why I just keep getting people who hold onto grudges against me."

She shrugged. "Mom didn't even get the job she was supposed to have here. They'd gone bankrupt and we were stuck in Reseda. I…tried to make friends. It wasn't…it wasn't like I didn't try. I did. I went to a beach with Frankie and got along with his friends, and Ali and her friends were there and I was getting along with her. And then Johnny and his posse came along."

John could see her face darkening. Honestly, he never knew the direct circumstances of the feud between her and his ex-students. He'd only come to hear about something when the boys came back after that Halloween, beat up and grumbling about that old Japanese guy beating them and that girl making them look like idiots. He'd then decidedly set off to make sure they would beat and humiliate the duo at the tournament, when the deal came about.

"God, Johnny was such an asshole!" Danielle burst out, looking irritable and startling John out of his thoughts. "Ali told me that they'd been broken up for weeks by then, but I remember him storming up to her and how possessive and angry he was. He totally didn't know what no meant, and after seeing him break her radio, he'd totally be an abuser! Or end up one."

John opened his mouth to defend his once student, when he uneasily wondered about it. He knew Johnny. And he knew the others. Or he thought he did. He didn't…he didn't really know them though, did he? They were capable of things like he was capable of things. He'd lashed out after the tournament, against Johnny too, so who was to say that his ex-student couldn't mess up like him?

"He gave you the trophy himself," he still found himself saying.

Danielle gave him a bland look. "He still beat me up with the skills he learned from you, for defending Ali while he was being a pompous asshole. In front of everyone and being the one to start the hostile and violent encounter, and escalating everything to a higher level of violence and aggression. Then he was an immature jerk during soccer tryouts and he and the others kept trying to trip me."

John winced. Yeah, Johnny sounded like he was being an idiot and he really was picking on the girl. What had been his problem anyway?

"My mom found work in the restaurant across from your old dojo," she said suddenly. "When I found out and came over, I remember seeing your dojo for the first time. I was actually kind of excited because I'd really wanted to take karate classes."

He perked up a little at that. He hadn't known that. Though if he stretched his memory, he could sort of recall it, with her lingering in the background and watching a little while he'd been teaching his class…

"I came over to check it out," she confessed. "I regretted it because I saw Johnny immediately and I was so angry that I practically ran back out of your dojo. He obviously saw me because when I was going home after that, they followed me and knocked me down with my bike downhill and I almost cracked my head wide open."

John flinched and found that he wasn't comfortable or happy hearing about her side of the events, especially considering he'd originally hadn't let himself think of her side. But he made himself keep quiet and listen because this was the start of penance, wasn't it?

"I was upset with him and his friends. I hated it here and I wanted to go back to New Jersey so bad," Danielle's voice began to sound frustrated. "I knew how things went there. Here, I didn't know the rules of things and I was even more alone here than I had been there. I just remember being so angry after I finally made my way back home and I trashed my bike and yelled at my mom, and we cried together and missed our old home."

"Moving somewhere is always hard," he found himself saying, and immediately thought it was idiotic and simple. But she blinked at him, and he noted in a panic how her eyes were a little teary as she'd talked. But she gave him a small smile, so maybe it hadn't been too bad.

"I found my bike all fixed up the next day," Danielle continued, starting to brighten up a little. "Mr. Miyagi fixed it up and even repainted it. I…I was really happy."

When John found her looking at him with bright eyes, he shifted in his seat a little. He inhaled deeply and made himself move his lips into a small smile for her, and quickly took a bite out of his food.

"Honestly, after I thanked him and decided to hang out more around his workroom and even did some bonsai trimming…I felt less alone and finally like I'd gotten a friend," Danielle's cheeks turned a little red. "Maybe it's a little sad that I became friends with an old repairman and hung around him, but I didn't care. I'd been miserable for a while in Reseda and it was just nice and peaceful around there, and Mr. Miyagi was nice and taught me some handy stuff. I can…I can use tools and all, you know? So I'm not all helpless with them like other girls."

Danielle fidgeted a little in her own seat. "I guess I've never been like other girls," she became a little disheartened at that. "I guess it's fitting that I learned how to use tools in the end…Other girls play with makeup, dress up, talk about boys…I guess I'm the weird one who wore baggy clothes, learned karate, and trimmed tiny trees and meditated…"

"It's not a bad thing," John blurted out. At her confused look, he cleared his throat awkwardly. "I'd probably have more to talk about with you. And you should think of yourself as unique, not weird."

"Um…thanks," she muttered. "You should…you should finish your food. It probably got cold."

John glanced down at his plate. It had gotten a little cold. Still…

"What happened Halloween?" he found himself asking. "I know things escalated really bad then."

Danielle's face darkened again. "I didn't want to go to the Halloween party at the school. I was fine hanging around Mr. Miyagi's, but he convinced me to go, and even made me a costume. So I went. And then I had to go bathroom and accidentally went to the boys' bathroom. Johnny was in there, about to smoke it up, and he just pissed me off all the time. And I thought, he shouldn't be smoking anyway. I got petty and thought I could just do a harmless prank on him and turned on the shower he'd been in. 'Course I ran out of there –not like I didn't end up getting chased all the way back to my apartment complex. I made it to the fences before I got caught." She shrugged at him. "I pissed him off enough that I ended up with a few bruised ribs, a dislocated shoulder, and a sprained wrist."

John's fingers tightened around his utensils. The way it had sounded before, he'd thought Johnny and the others had been the victims. He'd hands down not questioned them or their story, and had immediately sided with them.

"They were in the middle of beating me up when Mr. Miyagi came in and saved me," she was barely not mumbling. "I wanted to learn karate from him so I could fight back, but we decided to go see you instead. Then the whole tournament deal happened and well, you know what happened from then."

John did. And in hindsight, everything really had been petty and stupid and had gone out of control, when it really shouldn't of. And fuck, if part of that mess hadn't been his fault too.

They stopped talking then and took time to eat the food, though it had definitely gotten cold by then. He still shoveled it down and appreciated having food in the first place, especially food that tasted good.

He thought this was an achievement though. They hadn't gotten to talk about what had happened to her yet, but that she'd talked to him (of all people) was something. And of what she did talk about, was something personal so it definitely was progress.

Even if he did end up feeling a little miserable after all of it.

Started 2/8/16 – Completed 2/9/16


	4. I Started the Joke On Me

It had currently been almost two weeks since the beginning of her stay in the mansion with the two men she had thought she would never get along with. They weren't exactly at ease with each other, but it was an existence that was more peaceful than she'd ever thought could happen between the three of them. This was withstanding the fact she hadn't ever thought they'd share an existence together in the first place.

In fact, most times they stayed out of each other's ways. They spent a rare time eating a meal or two, usually when they could catch her cooking and would eat with her. Kreese, as Ter – _Silver_ told her, was capable of cooking some things, but it was limited and so he didn't cook often unless he and…Silver were desperate to get something in their stomachs.

She knew that it wouldn't last though. There was no way the three of them could just live with each other and not collide someway or other.

"Fancy seeing you here," a slightly cheerful voice spoke from behind her and she turned from the large gym mat centered in the middle of the room. She saw Terry standing by the entrance to the room, dressed in his karate gi.

When she didn't speak to him, his grin faltered and for a moment he awkwardly stood there.

"So, um," he gestured to the mat. "How about a spar for old time's sake?" Terry tried grinning again.

"No thanks," she said coldly and moved to brush passed him, only at the last moment he seemed to have made up his mind and stubbornly stood in her way.

"Come on, don't be like that," he obstinately kept his grin in place. "I'll even let you hit me a few times."

She paused. That was almost tempting. She glanced at him again and saw he was still grinning at her. Her mouth tightened into a scowl and she felt inexplicably angry, especially seeing his familiar, almost smug at times grin.

"Fine," she said tersely and moved back to the mat at one end.

Terry moved to the other end and then stepped onto it. She hesitated a moment, before taking off her shoes and socks and then moved onto the mat herself. For a few moments, they circled around each other and watched the other warily. And then she struck first, lashing out with a punch that he swiped away from him, and went to return against her with a knife-hand.

Some minutes passed as they traded blows that didn't land on each other, but Danielle grew increasingly frustrated, more so as she knew that he was taking it easy on her. It was less like "before" and not like "old times" at all because she remembered that he hadn't been so soft on her, even though she knew now it was more to make her incapable and less abled in the tournament than to really prepare her for anything. And he still had that familiar grin on his face that she used to really l – _hate_. She wanted to wipe it off his face right then.

And looking into his face, seeing him and then the image of Mike Barnes superimposed on the other, Danielle snapped and just lunged at the tall man, catching Terry off guard from the unexpected move. She tackled him to the ground, and it was less a karate match and more of a brawl as she lashed out at him and he just tried to grab hold of her without hurting her.

Between seeing Barnes and Terry –Silver! _Silver, damn it_! –Danielle was less focused on where and how to attack, and more on being on the attack and just being able to land a hit whenever, wherever.

Strong arms wrapped around her and pulled her off of Silver, and as she was pinned down, she started to flashback to that time with Barnes and she began to flail her limbs, screaming her head off. Immediately, whoever it was let go of her as if their hands had been burned, and she scrambled back on the floor and ended up with her back against the wall. She closed her eyes and curled into a ball, clutching at her head and rocking slightly. After focusing on her breathing a bit, and hearing nothing but silence in the room, she lifted her head up and opened her eyes to see Silver still sitting on the ground and staring at her in alarm, and Kreese (having been the one who pulled her off of Silver) standing around and looking at her in shock and panic.

Staring back at them with wide eyes and heaving breaths, she swallowed harshly and then clambered onto her knees. She stumbled onto her feet and then rushed out of the room.

God, why was she such a mess?

* * *

Terry didn't move from his spot. He didn't know what to say or do, though he knew his body ached (mostly his torso where her hits frequently landed). This hadn't been the reaction he'd been expecting…or wanted.

To be honest, he missed spending time with her like he used to. He missed their banter, the way she'd hit his arm after he said something egotistical, or the way she'd beam up at him after she did a move he taught her right (and he did actually teach her a few things).

He thought maybe this could have been the start of rebuilding their relationship after everything.

In the end though, it seemed Terry had just made things worse.

"You alright, Terry?" John asked him softly.

He looked up at his old friend grimly. "You know…I don't regret doing what I thought I had to before as your friend. I owe you. But…"

At the loss of Danielle LaRusso in his life, something had inexplicably become missing inside of him. The night she'd looked at him like a monster, the night she'd turned her back on him (but he'd turned his back on her first, hadn't he?)…an ache was created and built up in him.

And her leaving him behind had made that ache worse.

So here he was now, thinking and hoping maybe they could slip into things like it had been before. But it couldn't be like it was before. Not after everything that had happened. Not after what he did, what Barnes did.

"I need a drink," Terry declared. "I just…I need to get drunk."

"You want to be alone?" John asked.

Terry blinked and looked at John, and thought about it. He didn't want to talk about this with John. He didn't want to talk about this with anyone. He just wanted to get drunk and not think about it at all.

"I'll see you later, yeah?" Terry asked by way of his answer.

John nodded and Terry finally moved to get up. He left his friend behind and walked all the way to where he had his own bar. Huh. His nice, huge home. It was so large it could have housed over a hundred people in it. He had marble bathrooms, granite counters…

He was rich and he had everything he or anyone could ever want.

Somehow, meeting Danielle had screwed him up and made him realize he didn't really have anything at all.

* * *

John didn't know what the hell had happened. He'd walked into Terry's sparring room and watched in part amusement and part envy at the two of them beginning to spar. Honestly, a part of him had been a bit envious of Terry, who got to fight her, who even had been able to even teach her for a time…

But then shit seemed to have hit the fan for some reason, as he watched in fascination as to how her face morphed into an expression full of rage and she practically leaped at Terry and seemed to lash out however she could at his friend.

He didn't know where that had come from or why she had just let loose like she had, but he also didn't think she was okay at the moment and that she shouldn't be left alone. So after Terry left him, he went and searched her out, finding that she was quietly sitting on the front steps of the mansion. Without a word, he took off his own jacket and slipped it onto her shivering form, because he could handle the cold of the night better than she would. She didn't acknowledge him yet though.

"Cold night," he neutrally said. When she didn't answer him, he continued on. "I'm…sorry about earlier. I hadn't meant to upset you when I grabbed you. I was just trying to…"

"I know," she cut in softly, not looking at him. "It's my fault. I freaked out."

John hesitated, but made the decision to push through and ask. "He…He push you down like that and hold you down?"

He watched her shiver more obviously, but this time he knew it wasn't the cold.

"He held me down," she admitted, confirming his inquiry. "He held me down and had a strong grip on me like you did."

"I'm sorry," he apologized again, trying not to imagine it.

"Like I said, it was more my fault," she muttered. "I shouldn't have agreed to spar with Silver anyway."

He noted the use of Terry's last name, and wondered at that. He remembered, from what his friend had told him, that she had always been casual with him and called him Terry from the beginning.

"Why's that?" though he regretted it when he heard her answer.

"I despise him," she said in a flat tone, and which also answered the change from 'Terry' to 'Silver.' "And when I saw Barnes's image over Silver's face at the end, I couldn't help myself. I just attacked him."

John wavered on what to say next. On one hand, she had finally said something about Barnes and about what happened to her. On the other, he suspected that things might not end up well if he kept pushing more on that front, and that he also wanted to know what was her problem with his old friend.

"Why do you despise him?" he asked, making up his mind. "Terry, that is. At least enough that it was partly why you got angry and attacked him, apart from seeing Barnes."

Danielle seemed to want to curl in on herself and John resisted the urge to reach over.

"Because I really cared about him," she whispered the admission and John stiffened in shock. "I really liked him and I liked spending time with him, and he took all the trust and care I had for him and practically tore it up into pieces in my face."

John…John hadn't actually thought too much into how the whole thing with Terry and her happened and would work out. When Terry told him he was going to "mentor" Danielle and pretend to get her ready for the tournament, he had been supportive and thought it was a great idea. She would be unprepared and even weakened, and when the time came for the tournament she would be totally humiliated and would lose her title and fame.

He hadn't thought of it like this, hadn't thought of how she would feel and what would happen to her.

"I even thought I was in love with him," she let out a tiny sob and he exhaled in disbelief and stared at her, while she turned to look up at him with teary eyes. "I thought I was in love with him and was going to tell him that night, but instead he showed his true colors and you, he, and Barnes laughed in my face and it felt like he tore my heart out of my chest and stomped on it."

She finally burst into tears, because she hadn't really cried at all and he hadn't expected she would in front of him.

"But joke's on me, huh?" she sounded slightly hysterical. She gave him a self-deprecating smile. "Just blame it all on me, right? It's all my fault. It's always my fault."

He continued to stare at her numbly, inwardly feeling horrified.

"I," he started, his voice breaking. He licked his lips. "I'm an asshole. And so is Terry. We are complete and utter bastards. But I swear we'll do everything to make it up to you."

God, how _old_ was he? That he wouldn't care, that he would purposely target and want to hurt a teenaged girl like her? What was _wrong_ with Terry and him?

"I'm sorry," and he injected as much remorse as he could into it, like he had never bothered to do before in his life.

"I'm sorry," Terry's voice croaked out the apology too, and they turned to see him leaning heavily against his front door, loosely holding onto a bottle of whiskey.

The three of them were a mess, and John thought the joke was now more on him and Terry.

Started 2/13/16 – Completed 2/20/16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/n: I listened to George Ezra's "Blame It On Me" way too much. It's why this chapter is so depressing. But then this whole story is depressing (shrugs). Whoops. Please review this terrible, depressing fic?


	5. I'm a Little Unsteady

Terry sat behind the door, facing the inside of his home as he listened to John and Danielle whisper on the other side, sitting on the front steps in the middle of the night and weathering the cold. He didn't need to be in the cold anyway.

Apparently he was a cold-hearted bastard after all.

Looking back now, what he'd done to her was shittier than at first look. It was bad enough planning on and succeeding in taking her dependence and hoping to make her fail in the tournament, but he'd realized sometime in the midst of it all that he'd taken her trust and managed to become someone she trusted as a mentor and friend, and thought it would be a bonus in the end when he broke the truth to her. He hadn't realized exactly how bad it would be until that night and she'd given him that _look_.

But now it was even worse. Because he'd been given more insight to her side and how she felt about it, and hadn't thought to think of how much she cared for him. And worse, that she'd even loved him then.

For a moment, he felt a little resentment for John and wished for a moment that he had left Terry to die in Vietnam.

He drunkenly stumbled onto his feet, intending to hide away in either his room or his office, and had made it a few steps before he tripped and landed on his hands and knees, dropping his almost empty bottle of whiskey and vaguely noting it smashing onto the ground. He blearily looked at the mess, blinking a few times.

He felt familiar slender hands grip onto his arms and tug him up, and he lifted his head and looked at a weary Danielle.

"What're you doing?" his words slurred.

"Getting your drunk ass up," she muttered.

He weakly (fuck, he was messed up when he was drunk) tugged himself away from her, but she had an iron grip on him and he wasn't really pulling himself away.

"You don't owe me anything!" he yelled at her, finally mustering up some strength to yank himself away, only to land backwards on his ass on the unforgiving marble floor.

"You're right," she straightened up, face still blank. "I don't."

And then she was walking away from him and he was reaching out and wanting to call her back.

"Don't leave me again," he heard himself blurt out quietly, but she was too far away and he was too hesitant to say it any louder. He was surprised he had even said it at all.

A shadow stood over him and he looked to see John. His old friend looked worn out, and at this point Terry was sure the three of them were so tired they were going to call it quits on each other and themselves.

"You're a mess," John commented blithely.

"Fuck you," Terry muttered, letting himself flop back onto his back. He glanced in the direction of where she'd gone. "Since when were you two close?"

"We aren't."

Terry gave him a bitter look. "She doesn't look and act the same way towards you, the way she does me."

"I hurt her too," John acknowledged. "But she didn't care about me the way she did you. I was never close enough to her to make it really hurt."

And fuck, that was the difference between his and John's situations, wasn't it? John had always been Danielle's antagonist. She hadn't known him as anything different until now. All the times he'd hurt her, he'd always been "the enemy."

Then there was Terry, who had charmed her, buttered her up, acted like a friend and tried to be a mentor, and in the end had made her hate him at the same time she had made him love her.

"Fuck," he mumbled again, running a hand over his face. "Fuck."

Because that was what had happened and now all this happened and damn it all –

Terry was so, so screwed.

He sniffed and wiped at his eyes and made himself get up, ignoring the hand John held out to help him. Instead, he stormed passed his friend and headed to his room.

* * *

Though bewildered at his friend's reaction, John knew the situation had become completely FUBAR. Though he did hope the situation wasn't beyond saving, because a part of him knew that things had to be set right. All of him knew that.

But how do you set everything to right, after tormenting a girl that was half your age because your pride took a hit (even if his life did end up in shambles)? It hadn't even been her fault that he ended the way he had –it was Johnny Lawrence and John's own pride and temper.

Acknowledging he was wrong and apologizing had been the first steps, but they couldn't be the only things he did.

Terry looked pissed at him for some reason (or he was pissed and upset in general), so he wasn't sure if he should go after his friend. He was thinking he'd probably leave Terry to cool off, and maybe go after Danielle again. She was balancing on an edge and he wasn't sure which side she was going to end up falling to. Or if she'd be able to land safely and unharmed.

"Are you looking for me?"

He noticed her lingering by one of the hallway's balconies, huddled in on herself as she stared out to the night. He quietly sat on the chair opposite her, looking out at the night too. However, when he looked at her, he noted she was watching him and wondered how long had she?

"Something the matter?" he asked, inwardly anxious. All of his talks with her had so far ended dismally for him, even if progress with her had been made each time.

"What happened? After the tournament?" she paused and he waited until she was done before he would answer. "What happened that made you hate me so much, enough to want revenge?"

Shit. Why was she always throwing the hard questions at him?

He ran both of his hands through his hair several times, looking frustrated. He looked up at her and opened his mouth, but he couldn't force the words out. So, for a moment, John sat there and glowered at the floor of the small balcony they were on.

"You don't have to answer that," she said uncomfortably.

"Just…just give me a moment, okay?" he asked, holding up a hand and giving her a frustrated look. He sighed to himself. "After the tournament and what happened in the parking lot, I lost all of my students and my reputation."

John had remembered how low he'd felt. He also remembered how angry he'd been and how betrayed he felt at how he thought they'd all turned their backs on him. He told her that and watched as she looked at him contemplatively.

"It was hard after that," he shrugged. "I didn't really have a job, since I had no students. I couldn't pay the bills. I couldn't muster up any energy to care for anything for a while. Things became so dismal to the point I'd gone to Terry, trying to give the dojo back to him –it'd been a gift from him, you see? And well…he cheered me up. Told me that I had to get back on my feet, that we were going to get the dojo back in order, that he would even open up a chain of dojos. And then he thought of getting revenge on you and your old man, and just get back at you for what happened to me and the dojo, and after a moment I'd gotten riled up with him, and we were suddenly all gung ho on that plan."

"So in the end, you just wanted a scapegoat, someone to blame for all the problems you were going through," Danielle stated, though not bitterly like he'd thought she would. Just factually. "You could have gone after anyone involve in that really. You could have even gone after Johnny or any one of the others. It just so happened that you and Silver thought of me and blamed me the most. It wasn't really, truly personal."

Thinking back on everything again, no it really hadn't been, despite how much it looked personal. However, thinking of what Terry did and of Barnes… _they'd_ made it personal. After everything, after all that she'd went through, they'd made it personal for her.

"Would you want to make us pay?" he asked, curious at the same time as wanting her to say something about it and so he'd know what to do to help make things better. Hell, if she wanted to beat the crap out of him, fine. Just…just something to pull them all out of this limbo they were wallowing in.

"No," she surprised him by saying. "Revenge, wanting to make things 'equal'…it's a tiring business. And a miserable one," she finally unfurled herself, letting go of her legs in favor of looking over the balcony.

His hands twitched, wanting to reach over and make sure she didn't end up over it, accidentally or purposely.

"Before the whole thing with you and Silver, I was with Mr. Miyagi in Okinawa," she revealed to him. "Mr. Miyagi's best friend there had gotten angry at him over something and held a grudge for over a decade, wanting to 'duel' him to the death and regain his honor. While we were there, they eventually reconciled, but it showed me how holding a grudge, hating, and wanting revenge was a wasted effort and took so much out of everyone involved. They wasted 10 years where they could have been the best of friends."

"Does that mean you'd be willing to forgive even me?" he asked, wary of the answer but knowing he needed to hear it.

She looked at him thoughtfully again and gave him a sad smile.

"Yes, I think so."

"Even Terry?"

Her face shuttered then and John inwardly winced. She brought her hands up and studied them closely, curling them into fists after a moment.

"Maybe," she whispered, catching him off guard. "It'll take longer, but…maybe."

He swallowed heavily. "He…he cared for you too, you know. I don't think he noticed it, but when he used to talk about your training sessions together, sometimes he wouldn't notice that he'd look fond as he was talking about them and you. He'd even get this happy look in his eyes, and the way he talked was less mocking and insulting as he talked, more so with each passing session with you and talk with me."

She didn't answer him, but he thought he'd made great headway with the situation with her.

He did make sure to specifically stay away from mentioning anything of Barnes, because as far as he was concerned, some things were just unforgivable.

* * *

Terry was frowning as he read the report, making a few marks on it and then looking to the computer on his desk. He grumbled under his breath and took the mouse, moving the arrow on the monitor and clicking on a few things before he was interrupted.

"For some reason, I've never pictured you as actually doing any work."

He froze and let go of the mouse and paper, glancing at the entrance to his home office and seeing Danielle actually there. She was tense, obviously, but she was there. Terry forced himself to relax and give an easy grin.

"I do own a multi-billion company. Despite my seeming inattentiveness, I am required to do some work and keep up with things."

She walked further into the room, obviously uncomfortable, but she was also obviously making an effort.

"Seems strange to think about it, considering how much time you spent meandering around back then, even giving all that time to spend with me and pretending to train me."

He matched her nonchalance at the strained topic with his own nonchalance. "I own my company. I tend to act like I can do what I want, and go off doing whatever I feel like…Plus, I was kind of bored back then and I was having issues with people and legal problems. It was a nice break."

"I'm glad you were able to have it at my expense," she said dryly, but she wasn't hostile and she seemed fine, so he was going to take it as is gratefully.

"Well, you were much better company and amusement than what I was dealing with," he fired back. "Try dealing with old bastards who want to take over the company and steal everything from you every other day. I think I'd choose you over them anytime."

And she was fighting back a smile and he wanted to stare at it all day, inwardly thanking whatever god that was listening for this moment.

She pointed at his computer. "That's an Amiga 1000, isn't it?"

He blinked, having not expected her to recognize the computer, especially from where she was away from him and his desk.

"Yeah, it is. How'd you know?"

She shrugged. "My mom's main profession deals with computers, so I know a thing or two and try to keep up with the newest stuff. What are you doing?"

"Ah, just looking at this letter and the information I was sent, and comparing notes. I'm going to compose a response in a minute, but I'm putting it off as long as possible because I hate typing," he admitted to her.

She moved close enough to him that he could smell her usual scent of orange blossoms, and he'd forgotten the smell and how much he missed it.

"I'm good at it," she told him hesitantly. "You can dictate to me, if you…if you want," her voice faltered.

"Really?" he asked, wanting to blurt his agreement already instead.

"…Yeah."

He got up from his wheeled chair and held it still so she could sit on it. Then he pushed it closer to the desk and let her get settled. After, he took a step back and then got an idea.

"I want to say some letters first, so just type those out," he instructed her, and though she was confused, she got ready to do it. He said each letter slowly and clearly, and then when he was done, he stayed silent and still as he waited for her to see what she'd typed and give a reply (if she even would).

_I miss you_

Maybe if Terry was honest with her like he'd been with himself last night, they could try to move on. Because at that moment, he knew that she had meant more to him than she should have back when he'd been trying to manipulate her.

She swiveled the chair in his direction and was looking at him with a crumpled expression, and maybe this wasn't the best time, but he knew that there probably was never going to be a good time anyway.

For a moment, Danielle looked like she was debating with herself, and then she was moving from the chair towards him, and he didn't think she would hold him the way she used to back then –the way she was now.

"I miss you too," she muttered against him.

Started 2/27/16 – Completed 3/1/16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, sad feels. Also, John and Terry cuss too much XD


	6. A Heartbreak Situation

The rest of the week had been…strange. Danielle wasn't going to say it was great, but it wasn't bad. It was even better than her earlier time with them in the mansion, given how (though their existence together had been almost peaceful before anyhow) they were now spending more time in each other's presence, rather than trying to avoid running into each other. She was making an effort. She wasn't…she wasn't trying to hide from the world, from them.

If anything, she refused to wilt away from life after what happened, no matter what. That would just mean that Mike Barnes had won over her, and she wouldn't let that happen.

She just needed to stop flinching around John and Terry (she still wasn't sure about using their first names, but they had insisted and she was making an effort. Right. An effort). Or having nightmares.

At least her door muffled her screams at night.

"Mm, are you making omelets?" she heard Terry ask eagerly.

She felt herself begin to smile, and she let herself a little bit.

"Do you want one?" she raised an eyebrow, smirking slightly.

"Only if we get to eat with you," John entered the kitchen too, taking a seat at the island counter.

Danielle's smirk faltered and she looked hesitant. The two men looked at her expectantly, but they didn't push her.

' _Compromise, Danielle. You need to move on with your life.'_

"Sure," she agreed. "Two more omelets coming up, huh? Everything on the counter?"

"No mushrooms for me," Terry rocked on his feet, humming slightly. "My Ma used to tell me they were rat's umbrellas when I was a kid. Never got over that."

John rolled his eyes, while Danielle giggled.

"No tomatoes please," John requested, and Danielle nodded and got to work, chewing on her lower lip in concentration.

Still, she could feel their stares at her back, making her uncomfortable. She was hyperaware of them. Always had been, really. Their combined attention was a lot to take sometimes, but they were always careful to keep a distance until she relaxed or allowed them in closer.

Sometimes though, her hyperawareness and being uncomfortable was for other reasons that made her unwilling to look into and examine within herself. It brought up thoughts of her idiotic infatuation with Terry back in those days where she wanted to be a willing student for him, and the strange fascination she had with even John back when he was just the sensei of a bunch of stupid boys she was fighting with.

A thump near her and feeling a warm body coming slightly close shocked her out of her thoughts and made her yelp, defensively lashing out with a fist. She blinked as she turned and saw Terry leaning away, his arm still up to block her. They exchanged shocked looks, before they both slowly relaxed.

"I-I'm sorry," Danielle started feeling shame and frustration with herself, also aware of John's gaze on her, even if she wasn't looking his way. "I didn't mean to do that."

"No, I'm sorry," Terry held up his hands. "I shouldn't have startled you. You alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine," she muttered, trying to go back to focusing on cooking. "I'm…working on that."

"We understand," she heard John say from behind her. "Don't worry about it."

Angrily, she turned off the stove and tossed the spatula on the counter before going to face them.

"I can't _stop_ worrying about it!" she shouted. "I'm tired of being like this! I'm tired of being skittish and flinching all the time! I'm tired of being like some kind of…some kind of scared deer, always ready to run off! Why the hell did I learn karate for, if it wasn't to do something against jerks like Barnes and stop something like _that_?! What's wrong with me that I couldn't even fight back properly to stop him?"

"That is _not_ your fault!" John stood up from his seat. "You aren't at fault for what he did!"

"I beat him in the tournament!" her voice turned shrill. "I should've been able to fight back! This shouldn't have happened to me at all!"

"He wasn't sticking to any rules and no one was there to watch or stop him," Terry said firmly, speaking up as well. "You can't blame yourself for Barnes coming at you like he did, especially at your old man's funeral."

Danielle made a frustrated noise and she just felt furious all of a sudden.

"I should've been able to fight back!" she shouted at them. "Unlike other girls, I knew how to fight back! But I didn't! I was stupid afraid of him! I always had been! That's why that asshole managed to toss me out of my car! That's why I ran, instead of hitting him! That's why I ran into that stupid forest! I should have been able to do something other than struggle and scream, even though he'd tackled me to the ground…I should have…I should have…I shouldn't have let him slam my head onto the ground or flip me onto my back…I should've done more than scratched at his hands when he was choking me…I should have…" she broke down into sobs and buried her face into her hands, sliding to the floor.

"I don't want to be numb anymore, like I was then…I don't want to be numb and unfeeling," she kept sobbing. "I should have let him kill me…" she gripped her hair tightly, curling into a ball.

"Don't say that," Terry said harshly, dropping down next to her and placing his hands against hers, trying to pry her fingers off. "Don't do this, Danielle."

John was at her other side then, helping Terry take her hands away.

"You're hurting yourself," he murmured. "Don't do that. Don't let him get to you."

"I didn't do anything to stop him. Why learn karate, when I couldn't even use it to protect myself?" she continued sobbing, though she was quieting down and finally letting them take her hands away from her hair. "I couldn't do anything…"

Terry wiped her face with his hands, while John held her hands together (firm but not too firm).

"You can learn whatever you can. Sometimes it just won't help. It still doesn't make what happened to you your fault," Terry made her look into his eyes. "Don't you think that. If it's anyone's fault, it's Barnes. And mine for being the idiot who hired him and made him come after you in the first place."

"You didn't know what he was like, or that he would do this," Danielle muttered.

"I didn't, but I still brought him in and made him part of this mess," Terry said bluntly. "Which is more of a real fault than you not being able to stop him from raping you."

She flinched at the word, having tried to avoid it. But she knew it wasn't good or healthy of her to. She sniffled a little.

"I don't want to feel numb," she said softly, staring at her lap, where hers and John's hands were. "When it happened and afterwards, all I felt was numb and empty inside. I don't want to feel like that."

"You don't have to," John squeezed her hands. "Just tell us what you need, what would help you. What would…what would be needed to make this better."

"Danielle, we're not going anywhere," Terry added seriously. "If you need to scream out your frustration, take out your anger on something…we're here. We'd deserve it anyhow, after what we did before."

She reluctantly nodded in understanding, biting her lip hesitantly.

"I don't…I don't want to be alone right now."

John nodded. "Terry works mostly at home anyway, and to be honest, the new hire at the dojo is doing fine teaching solo so I don't have to come in as much. We're here."

She sniffed a few times, shifting a little. She wasn't sure what to say or do right then.

"Let's watch a movie," Terry suggested. "I'll pop in a tape or see what's on TV, and we'll just crash on the couch with junk food or something. Or share the one good omelet Danielle managed to make."

"That was mine," Danielle felt her lips twitching.

"It's ours now."

"It has mushrooms," she warned.

"I can pick them out," Terry said smugly, which earned him a brief burst of soft chuckles from her.

"Tomatoes?" John unexpectedly cut in.

Danielle shook her head. "I don't like them either."

John smirked widely, while Terry huffed.

* * *

They grabbed a large bag of chips, microwaved some popcorn and dumped it into a huge bowl, and snacked on the lone omelet (which Terry did indeed pick out the mushrooms and shuffled them over to Danielle and John to eat). After they got all that, they went into the living room, or what Terry claimed was the living room, and put on something that was on TV. Unluckily for John and Terry, it was _Dirty Dancing_.

They shared grimaces over Danielle's head, but said nothing about the movie choice, especially given that she actually seemed to really want to watch it when she saw what was on and what they had managed to land the channel on.

"Your hair reminds me of Patrick Swayze's, especially in here," Danielle said suddenly, while she was watching the movie intently.

"Whose?" Terry blinked.

"John's hair…Actually, Patrick Swayze kind of really reminds me of him…"

John blinked this time, before wearing a wide smirk, tossing over a smug look at Terry, who was scowling and almost (but never would admit to it) pouting.

"It's the arms. The muscled arms that are always being showed off, and the muscled torso. And the hair," Danielle squinted her eyes at the screen. "Also, Patrick's face kind of looks like John's…"

John was going to take that all as a compliment, especially being compared to Patrick Swayze of all people. Even if, mostly the beginning part of that, it almost seemed like a jab at him. He did _not_ show off his arms all the time…

They let her watched the movie, drafted into paying attention since they were sandwiched on the couch together and doing nothing but watching TV together and eating. By chance, when it was near the end of the movie, John looked down and found that she had fallen asleep and was leaning heavily against a stiff Terry.

He raised his eyebrows. "You okay?"

"Peachy," Terry said sarcastically.

"What's the problem then?" John watched him in confusion.

"I'm uncomfortable," Terry mumbled.

"Uncomfortable?" John felt incredulous. "Danielle's not exactly heavy. She's actually pretty light."

Terry gave him an agitated look. "It's hard to be in this position when I'm not exactly…platonic towards her."

What the hell was that supposed to mean? John gave Terry and his position a harder look, zeroing on Terry's face and the look he had, and stopping short of blurting it out. Instead, he stared at his friend in surprise.

Since when had Terry felt like that towards Danielle? On second thought…

Maybe Terry had always felt like this. It probably hadn't hit him until…until that night. The night Danielle had said something about her own feelings.

For some reason, the thought of Terry being in love with Danielle put a frown on John's face. More so at the thought that maybe she still liked Terry. _Did she?_

Unhappily, John wore a frown for the rest of the movie.

* * *

Terry flipped the channel as soon as the movie was over, trying to find something else to watch that would be less of a chick flick, and more something to his and John's tastes. _Predator_ came up, so he put that on and tried not to focus too much on the warm body lying on him.

Fuck, he was having trouble concentrating.

Realizing he didn't have platonic feelings for a girl practically half his age was making this situation worse than it already was. He'd already mucked her life up enough as is. He didn't need to complicate it any more.

And he felt John's judging eyes on him earlier. Fuck that and fuck him. Besides, he'd be there when John realized how he felt about her. And then the two of them could commiserate over their stupidity in falling for a girl who probably still hated their guts.

What did that say about them?

They just…shouldn't be feeling this way. They shouldn't have let any of this get so far, and now they shouldn't have let themselves get in so far over their heads.

"I'm miserably in love with her," he blurted out in confession all of a sudden. He didn't look over to see if John was looking at him now. "I wish I could have…I wish I could have realized that a long time ago, back when none of this had happened and I was just this awesome guy in her life."

"It would've been simpler, wouldn't it?" John's voice sounded off and Terry looked over, saw him looking back with a stoic look on his face. "You and her, happy ending, right?"

Terry's jaw clenched. "Could've been."

"But it isn't. That's reality. You and I fucked up and now we have to clean up our messes."

Terry took a deep breath, looking bitterly at the TV and then at John. "I know that…" he muttered.

"After that, I guess it's just up to her though," John ended tiredly, but Terry hadn't expected that.

It sounded…a little more hopeful for the two of them, than he could have guessed for.

* * *

When Danielle woke up, she realized she was still in the living room. More so that she realized she was lying on Terry, also passed out with a troubled look on his face, and that her legs and feet were planted firmly on top of John's lap. He was also sleeping, looking tired.

She bit her lip, but didn't say anything or move. She didn't want to wake them up, and she didn't want to move away anyway.

God, she felt really stupid.

Danielle knew the two of them had hurt her before, really badly, and yet…she couldn't help how she felt about them anymore than she realized it was wrong. She knew all about them, remembered everything they had said and done to her in the past. But it was in the past and she was trying to move on, right?

Despite everything, she remembered the time she spent with Terry clearly. And she had really enjoyed it and being with him, and she missed those times herself. She shouldn't, but she wanted to spend her time with him. Even with John, who she found herself enjoying being around now. Aside from the flinches and the sudden movements, she didn't mind them being close or even touching her.

The truth was that she wanted that a little too much.

They were all sorts of wrong for her, she knew. After everything, that was clear to her. But they were trying and they wanted to make up for before. And they were doing their best to help her. Why couldn't they be the right kind of wrong?

Oh God, she just knew she was going to be making mistakes.

Started 3/14/16 – Completed 3/15/16


	7. Crown of Thorns

It's been a full month since Danielle had been with them. Today was one of her bad days, as she lay against John and watched the television dully, her eyes not even really watching whatever was on.

She snapped at them halfheartedly a few times that morning, before mostly walking around in a zombie-like state. Sometimes she would be staring off into space, and her flinching around them was worse than normal, especially considering how it had been getting a lot better around them.

Terry didn't know what the fuck to do.

Days like this, they just endured it and tried their best to make her feel better or make the day as less painful and just plain easier on her. They knew she felt bad whenever she lashed out, and that she tried to keep it to herself, but both of them had made it clear it was alright for her to do so and that they understood and could (and would) take it.

"I'm tired," Danielle murmured as she lethargically got up from the couch and moved away from John. "I think I'm going to take a nap."

"Okay," John said quietly, watching her as Terry kept quiet from his spot at a desk. Then John turned to Terry. "I think I'll go for a run, maybe check in at the dojo."

Terry nodded, still not saying anything. Once he was alone, he looked for the cell phone he kept nearby, grumbling to himself how it was so huge and such a pain to carry around. No wonder it was nicknamed "The Brick." Still, the Motorola DynaTAC phone was the best and most well-known phone at the moment, and he was always one to have the best. Maybe Danielle would like one…make it easier on her to contact that girl friend of hers…Ali, he thought it was…

It would be easier on him and John if she had a way to contact them too, if she wanted to go out or hell, if she was around the house away from them or if they were out of the house.

He punched in the numbers to the number he had memorized and waited for the good old doctor to answer.

"Hello, this is Richard Rosier speaking. How may I help you?"

"Dr. Rosier? This is Terry Silver. You gave me your number in case we needed…advice in regards to helping Danielle," Terry reluctantly said in the phone.

"Ah. I see. May I know how she's doing and what's going on now?"

Terry, to the best of his ability, told him how Danielle was and now what was going on between her and them and how she was acting. The doctor hmmed a lot but stayed quiet, making Terry nervous and unsure.

"I think now's the time to be going to a professional," Dr. Rosier suggested gently. "She obviously has been accepting of you two and letting you in, and that's great. Better than expected, especially when one takes in her situation. But as much as she's talking to you, I think what she needs right now is someone more objective and not so close to her or the situation."

Terry grimaced. He wasn't sure of this, and he was definitely not sure that Danielle would like this or go for it.

"I'll talk to her about talking to a…professional," Terry withheld his sigh. "I'll give you a call if she's up for it or not."

"Alright, I'll wait on you. Just keep that in mind, and maybe think about having her go to group counseling with others like her, and maybe get her out of the house more than she has been."

Terry hung up and stared at his phone, glaring lightly at it. He just wanted things to be better. He just wanted things to be back to the way they were, back when it was him and Danielle and they were trading barbs and jokes and sparring –

"Who was that?"

He turned around to face John, who looked only slightly out of breath. That he did at all though, made Terry guess that John had pushed himself harder than ever, probably in an effort to not think about things.

"Dr. Rosier," Terry told him. "I was calling…see if he had any useful advice," Terry slouched in his chair. "He thinks she should talk to a professional."

John almost made a face, echoing how Terry felt about that, but then again…if it would really help her, then they should give it a try.

"He also said that she should think about going to those group counseling sessions with others like her, and that we should try getting her out of the house more."

"She has been cooped up in the mansion since she's gotten here," John mused aloud. "We're not exactly making her stay here, so she's more or less preferring to stay in. Which means we're going to have to convince her to go out."

"You think she's afraid of going out?" Terry said aloud what they were both thinking.

John cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Well, we'll be there in any case. I can take her on my runs. I know you said she liked doing those a lot before."

"She went for a run whenever she needed to clear her head or was feeling bothered about something," Terry remembered. "I went with her one time. She gets really focused and gets this intense, upset look on her face, and the worse whatever it is, the worse she pushes herself to go faster."

"I didn't know she was kind of self-destructive," John raised an eyebrow.

"She is a bit," Terry muttered. "When she's really upset and down about something, she used to work herself to the bone in our practices. I couldn't help feeling bad about everything then."

Still, he wasn't looking forward to asking Danielle about this, given how much he was sure she'd be pissed he was even suggesting it.

To his surprise, she didn't even flinch at the suggestion, when he found her awake later and talked to her about it. She just looked tired and resigned.

"Will it help?" she asked wearily.

"I don't know," he said honestly. "But it could."

"Then I'll try it," she rubbed her face with her hands. "I'm tired of being like this and feeling so crappy all the time. I'm sure you and John don't appreciate me snapping at you guys, like this morning."

"Which we've told you is fine and we understand," Terry once again said firmly. "And it wasn't even that bad or too many times."

"I snapped at you and John a total of seven times."

"Like I said, not that much."

It made her smile a bit, which made him grin inwardly to himself.

"You kept count?" he continued in amusement, which earned him a blush. "Heh, come on. Let's go eat out for once. We'll have dinner somewhere."

"Eat out where?" though she had gotten up and started to follow him out of her room.

"Somewhere," he said obstinately, causing her to puff out her cheeks cutely. He smiled outwardly this time and even dared to reach out and grab her hand. Since she didn't say anything, Terry felt relieved and relaxed a little.

"Hey, John!" he called out to his friend, who looked at their held hands strangely. He ignored it. "We're going out to eat. Grab a jacket."

"Yeah, yeah. Hold your horses," John grumbled, grabbing a jacket for all of them.

As Danielle didn't have one, she'd been tossed one of theirs (John's looks like) and she put it on and looked pretty dwarfed in it. Still rather cutely, Terry added in his head.

They ended up in a 4-star Michelin restaurant, dressed in t-shirts, jeans and laughing to themselves about the scandalized looks they were getting.

* * *

Danielle was tensed up and looking around cagily. She knew she should lighten up and she shouldn't really be so freaked out about the meeting with the psychologist…therapist. This was just a counseling session. She was supposed to talk to her and she would tell her some stuff. That was all.

She was not comfortable with this though.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. The next time she opened them, she was watching the waiting room and thinking how cold it felt. Wincing, she got up and attempted to walk out of the room. The moment she opened the door though, she blinked in surprise at seeing John and Terry at the other side.

"We figured you wouldn't want to be here and might want to escape," Terry said with a small grin.

They grabbed an arm each and led her back into the waiting room, sitting down with her at some chairs grouped together.

"Don't be freaked out," John gave her a side glance. "We'll be here too, alright? We'll wait with you and for you while you're in there."

She felt a bit better about things, but she still felt a little anxious. Still…now that the two of them were there and holding her hands, she wasn't so bothered about going in to talk to this person who would be analyzing her, picking her apart…

She looked around and saw the empty waiting room, and then looked to her sides to see John and Terry looking at her carefully. She sat back in her seat, but she straightened up and focused her gaze forward.

"I hurt myself sometimes," she confessed quietly, feeling their hands tightened around her hands at that. "Just to…just to see if I can still feel. I don't want to feel numb again, so I focus on the pain. I just can't stop remembering everything."

"Danielle," John croaked out, but she didn't let him continue.

"My head's full of broken thoughts," she bit her lip. "I can't fix them. I don't know if I can. And sometimes…sometimes I want to make everyone hurt around me. To make them feel as hurt as I do all the time. And I'll hurt you too," she blinked back tears. "I'll just let you down, like I always seem to do for everyone else. Why else does everyone keep leaving me? You should just leave before it happens."

She sniffled just as John moved to crouch in front of her, while Terry tightened his hold on her hand even more.

"That is not true at all," John looked her in the eyes. "No one left because of that and _we're_ not going anywhere. And I don't want to hear about you hurting yourself. You feel like doing that again, you just come to us."

She used her sleeve from her unoccupied hand to wipe her eyes. "It's really ironic, you know? After everything, you two have become the sweetest friends I've ever had."

Terry nudged her playfully. "And we'll defend that title to the end."

She choked out a teary giggle, and grinned at the two of them.

"You guys are the best," she gave them a small smile.

John snorted, going back to sit at his chair. "Glad you think so. Everyone else thinks we're assholes."

"But her opinion is the only one who matters," Terry snarked at him, giving a smirk.

"Eh, yeah. I guess you're right. Who cares about everyone?"

"Danielle LaRusso?"

They stopped talking and immediately turned to the office door, where a tall brunette stood waiting, watching them curiously.

Danielle cleared her throat nervously and threw anxious glances at them, but they gave her encouraging grins so she stood up and let go of their hands. She already missed them.

She took another deep breath and willed herself to walk over to the lady.

* * *

Danielle was a petite, pretty girl with short brown hair and expressive doe-like eyes. She also remembered her from an article stating she was some sort of karate champion, which was impressive, especially for a girl in this day and age.

Karate competitions were usually a male circuit, and the first year women were allowed to compete in competitions was apparently also the first year Danielle competed. 1984 was a big year for her then.

"Hello, Danielle. I'm Dr. Rosefield," she introduced herself, giving a friendly smile to the nervous girl.

So, so nervous…she noted it in the way she was almost practically clinging to the two men out there in the waiting room. That was also something she noted very easily and was a detail she took note of interestingly.

She didn't think they were related. The way the men leaned into her space was too intimate, and the way she looked at them denied any of that.

"Hi, Dr. Rosefield," Danielle greeted quietly, not looking at her.

Instead of sitting behind her desk, she directed Danielle to one seat and then took the seat opposite her.

"How about we just try to get to know each other?" she told the skittish girl, still smiling. "We can just state some facts, likes and dislikes…just to get comfortable and not rush into things, especially for anything you're not ready for, alright? Does that sound good to you?"

Danielle looked surprised, but nodded slowly. Her smile widened even more.

"Great! Let me start first. I love the color purple and I adore all four current Rocky films, though the third one might be my favorite. Apollo Creed becomes extremely likable!"

Her patient looked at her curiously, and seemed to become more relaxed by then. "I've…never seen them."

And it looks like they were off to a great start.

Started 3/29/16 – Completed 4/1/16


	8. It's Not Too Late

Danielle seemed to be doing much better. She was having less depressed moments, and snapped less at Terry and himself these days. She also seemed livelier and more herself (at least what John assumed was like herself, since he hadn't really known her before all this and Terry wouldn't talk about his past with her).

She had also, amusingly, asked to see all four current Rocky movies. Taking that as a cue that maybe she was back on track and hopefully getting better, Terry had cheerfully agreed and procured the movies. They were also kind of thankful it wasn't going to be a marathon of chick flicks.

" _Any reason for the Rocky movies?"_

" _My therapist brought it up. I thought it'd be nice to check them out."_

While not sure why they'd be brought up in a therapy session, it seemed to be a good way for Danielle to just try for normality and hopefully help herself get her life to normal. So they had a marathon planned out for that Friday night, and John was in charge of buying snacks from the store. To be honest, he was being a little biased and just getting snacks that he liked, but he did sneak in a few of Danielle's favorites.

"Sensei?"

That made him freeze and he turned slowly to the familiar voice. Seeing his old student Bobby (thank God it wasn't Johnny), John forced himself to nod.

"Bobby," he muttered. "And you don't have to call me 'Sensei.' I'm not your teacher anymore. Just John is fine." Lord knows if he heard 'Mr. Kreese', he'll be his fucking dad.

Bobby bit his lip. "Um, how have you been?"

"Alright," John answered gruffly, trying to keep his answers short.

The younger male glanced at John's cart.

"That's a lot of snacks," he noted. He saw a particular one. "Are those marshmallows? I thought you hated marshmallows?"

"Danielle likes s'mores," he answered before shutting his mouth. He hadn't meant to blurt that out.

Bobby looked surprised. "Danielle? Danielle LaRusso?"

John pursed his lips, but kept his tone neutral. "Yeah…She's been staying with me and a friend of mine recently. It's a long story."

Bobby nodded awkwardly. For a moment, they just stood there. John was just about to excuse himself when Bobby spoke up.

"So how's she been doing?"

John swallowed heavily. He thought back to all that had happened and how Danielle had been coping. But he thought back to recent days and how Danielle was actually seeming to be much better than before.

"Good," he decided on recently. "Her mentor died kind of recently and…there were other things going on. But she's better now."

He looked oddly relieved, but John didn't ask.

"That's…that's good. Um…could you…could you tell her I'm sorry? About before?" he asked, remorse seeping into his voice.

That caught him off guard, but it wasn't too surprising. Bobby had always been the more understanding and sympathetic of the group, and regarding the situation with Danielle before, Bobby had been the least aggressive. That gave him an idea though. A hesitant one, but still an idea.

"You could do that yourself," John said. "We're having a movie marathon tonight. You could join us?"

Bobby looked surprised but then hesitant. Then he was grinning widely.

"Sure, sounds good to me!"

John hoped it would help Danielle open up to more people and get her feeling more secure.

* * *

Danielle helped Terry out, doing her best to make things look nice. It helped her focus on it and not on how hard she had been taking things. A hand on her shoulder stopped her and she looked up into Terry's uncertain but still smiling face.

"You okay?" he asked quietly.

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I still have hard days sometimes. I stand and stare off into space, or I cry myself to sleep. Sometimes I just want it all to stop, and I don't know how to make it."

She kept quiet then, looking morosely at the floor.

"You know," she was surprised to hear Terry speak up. "Sometimes I regret letting you find out I was working with John to bring you and Old Man Miyagi down. Sometimes I just wished I kept my mouth shut and the two of us kept on as we did. I really did enjoy being around you and our time together, and losing that…It wasn't until you were gone and we weren't hanging out with each other anymore that I realized just how much I liked having you around and that you had really become a good friend."

Danielle looked at him in shock and he was tiredly looking down at their preparations.

"If…" She swallowed slowly. "If you could, would you do things differently from then?"

He looked at her and his mouth lifted up a little. "To be honest, I think John and I would have been happy taking that time to meet you differently and be people you'd like to be around."

She shifted in place for a moment, before she hesitantly leaned forward and hugged him. She could feel his surprise and a moment passed before his arms moved around her and held her tight. It was like that for a while, until they heard the entrance open and shut and John yelled out to them.

"Hey, I'm back! I got a guest too," which caught them off guard.

They let go of each other and looked towards the kitchen's entrance, where John appeared with a few bags of groceries and someone who Danielle hadn't expected to see ever since that first karate tournament she'd participated in.

"Uh, hey, Danielle," Bobby Brown waved uncertainly. "How have you been?"

Speechless, she just stared a moment while Terry and John moved restlessly nearby and traded looks with each other, Terry in particular was questioning.

"H-hi," she finally said. She made herself relax and smile. "I'm okay…You?"

She glanced at the other two, who nodded at her, and she moved towards Bobby. He began talking earnestly to her, and she found herself relaxing as time went by and she chatted with Bobby, becoming more and more enthusiastic as she did.

Maybe life really was becoming better for her and _she_ was becoming better.

* * *

"Well, I'm glad that worked out," John muttered and Terry glanced at him.

"Fair warning next time," he grumbled. "Didn't expect the kid to party crash. Who is he anyway?"

"Bobby," John answered with a small shrug. "He was a student of mine before shit hit the fan."

"Ah."

Terry glanced at the talking young adults. "You think this was a good idea?"

John glanced at them too. "I think so. She needs to talk to more people, stop keeping to herself. And us."

"I kinda liked having her all to ourselves," Terry grinned a bit and John rolled his eyes.

"It _was_ nice not having to share her," John admitted.

"Too bad it couldn't last," Terry mused, but even he knew that it was better this way. Danielle had to find her way back to normalcy and finding herself back in society, talking to other people, and not hiding from the world.

He shook his head and then looked at what John had gotten, sneering in disgust.

"You selfish bastard –this is all your crap! I wanted some Cheetos!"

"Ruffles are better!"

"Goddamn you!"

Terry huffed while John smirked, but both of them shrugged when Danielle looked over to them questioningly. She shook her head in amusement before turning back to Bobby.

"This'll be a good memory for her," John murmured.

Terry couldn't argue with that.

* * *

They all, minus Bobby, managed to stay up and watch all four Rocky movies, though they were struggling to sleep. They sprawled out on Terry's large living room floor, most of the junk food set aside on the coffee table that had been pushed back and away from them. There was probably a few empty beer cans around, though Terry or John would just lazily kick or shove those away.

The three of them were all kind of tired and ready to pass out, but they didn't quite yet. John yawned widely as he stretched out on the comforter, while Terry blindly reached for the remote to turn the television off. When they did, the room was bathed in darkness.

A thought entered through Terry's mind and he tried to look for Danielle through the darkness.

"Hey, Danielle?" he whispered.

He heard some rustling and then Danielle answered him. "Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

"Aside from the obvious stuff of what I'm dealing with," she said sarcastically, though it was with a light tone. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

Terry stayed quiet, though even he could feel John nudging him and hear the silent 'what's up?'

"I mean, what with exactly with the obvious stuff you're going through," Terry said quietly. "Doesn't this…doesn't this bother you? Being here with us, sleeping in the same room? Being the only girl and the rest of us are guys? If it…if it does, you know you can always slip upstairs and stay in your room…"

He worried when he didn't hear anything back from her and hoped that it meant she had fallen asleep, and not that she was disturbed by the situation and was upset with his question.

"I'm good," she said suddenly, which he hadn't expected. "I'm…I'm not so upset to find myself freaking out with you two so much anymore, and I feel safer with you two around anyway. I grew used to being around you guys. And Bobby…he's always been the nice guy, and tried not to get into it with me back then. And with you two around, I don't feel so scared of other people. So I'm good, okay? I mean it."

Terry made an agreeing noise, inwardly feeling relieved.

"There's plenty of space for all of us on this floor," John started, catching Terry's attention. "But if you want, you can move to come here between me and Terry."

That made Terry tense up, both anxious and excited, but not really thinking Danielle would go for it. But then he heard more rustling and then he saw a dark shadow stand up and coming carefully towards him. Closer, he saw the outline of Danielle's body as she stood near his head and then crouched down. She felt around as she tried to not stumble across John or him, and he couldn't help sitting up and grabbing onto her. She tensed and he worried that he'd scared her off, but then he felt her relax and John then echoed his action, grabbing onto her from the other side and helping her find her way between them and then letting her move down and then shift onto her back.

While she got comfortable, Terry wondered what he was going to do now. He was happy she was there and trusting him, but he was also aware of how he felt and didn't want to do something that would scare her or make her uncomfortable. He took his cue from John, who had settled back to lying down and somewhat keeping his distance from her.

"C-can I hold onto your hands?" she asked, voice small.

Terry swallowed harshly, and slowly moved his hand closer to her and let her complete the journey to his, her small hand tentatively touching his before grasping it fully. He could guess the same thing happened on her other side with John.

"Goodnight," she murmured sleepily, her breathing starting to even out.

Terry couldn't say anything back, all the words he wanted to say stuck in his throat.

Started (?) – Completed 10/3/16


	9. To Move Forward

Danielle woke up first. After the night being as it was, she was both surprised and not surprised about her position between John and Terry. It gave her mixed feelings and she did her best to push them down and not focus on them. Instead, she gingerly left her spot and glanced over to the far side of the blanket bed to see Bobby sprawled out in his area, having all that space to himself. He was drooling a bit and had a goofy grin on his face, making her smile slightly.

She then turned her attention to the exit, where she knew would lead to the kitchen and her feet padded quietly on the floor as she headed there. Deciding to make breakfast, she began pulling out ingredients and the pans she would need, unable to keep her mind from wandering back to the night before and thinking about the way she had asked to hold their hands, had surprisingly agreed to sleep between them, and that she had actually not minded as she thought she would in the end. She thought she would be tensed all night, and even sometime then end up freaking out.

But she had stayed there and she had relaxed, and she had easily fallen asleep.

Danielle had felt safe and secure, and hadn't felt an ounce of fear, nor the urge to cringe away from them and their touch and closeness. Instead, she had welcomed it and it made her feel happy and hopeful for the future, and that maybe she wasn't as messed up (or at least she was healing).

"Morning," she heard John say quietly and she looked up from cutting onions to see him at the kitchen's entrance watching her.

"Morning," she smiled and she saw him relax and smile back.

"You alright?" he asked tentatively and she knew he was referring to last night.

"Yeah," she said honestly. "A lot more than I thought I'd be. I…I think I'm doing much better than before. I can do this. I can be around people more now, I think."

"That's good," he was grinning. He came closer and she shifted over to give him some space to be next to her. "Terry and I…we've got a long ways to go for you, but we're not going anywhere."

"Yeah? You mean that?" she asked. "I've got a lot of scars and Dr. Rosefield says these kind of things don't get fixed overnight. She and the support group I'm in say that sometimes they never really go away and maybe I'll have to deal with this…with me as I am now for the rest of my life."

"Terry and I are in it for the long haul," John reaffirmed. "We fucked up by you, you know? And outside of that obligation, we really like you and think that if we had met another way and things had been different, we'd have been friends sooner and none of this shit would have happened."

Danielle's lips twitched up sadly. "That would've been nice."

She saw John hesitate and waited patiently. He took a deep breath.

"That being said," he started, "I realized that I do like you. Like a lot. And fuck if I don't know that's probably really messed up, what with our history, but I do. And I don't know if this is the right time, or if there's a right time, or you're even okay enough or ready for it…but do you want to go out? With me. Like for dinner…maybe tonight?" he ended uncomfortably.

She stared at him, having not expected that. But, thinking about it, the idea of going out on what sounded like a _date_ with John didn't put her off. She didn't feel like cringing or feel scared off, and maybe that was another sign she was going to be okay. And maybe, just maybe, it would be alright to go out with him.

"And this is probably a dick move of just asking you out without telling Terry, but I really like you and I couldn't help blurting it out –"

She looked at him in confusion. "Why would you tell Terry first?"

John grimaced. "It isn't really my business or anything and he should be the one telling you, but Terry likes you too. He probably even knew it a lot longer than I did, but here we are."

Danielle bit her lip. "To be honest, I like you. And I like Terry. And I'm really confused and have been for a while. I don't really know where my head's at, but I do still want to go out with you tonight actually."

She watched as relief washed over John's face and he gave a slight smile. "I'll, uh, tell Terry about it."

"Tell me what?" Terry sleepily joined them and Danielle watched him closely.

She had no idea that Terry liked her back. She didn't know about John either. The idea that either of them liked her at all, much less in that way, was surreal. But it seemed kind of fitting, after everything the three of them went through together. And it was hard to picture her with someone else who didn't know what she'd been through and had dealt through all of it with her and for her.

She knew that, deep inside, she had always been attached and attracted to them, even when they were her enemies. But it was at this point now, when they weren't enemies and they were at the edge of something, where she had to look forward and try to see what happens now.

"I asked Danielle out," John admitted. "I was gonna take her out to dinner tonight."

She watched Terry wake up more and stare at him, straightening up and frowning, though nothing else showed on his face aside from a brief emotion passing in his eyes.

"Is…is that so?" Terry asked carefully. "That's…that's great. Really. I hope you two have fun."

At that moment, Bobby walked in on the scene, yawning and waving tiredly.

"Hey all, what's for breakfast?"

* * *

Breakfast didn't end up awkward like she thought it would. There was a slight tenseness that went over Bobby's head, but it mostly was almost the same as always.

"We should hang out again," Bobby told her as he got ready to leave. "My boyfriend would probably love you. He's a photographer, you see?"

She made no outward notice of a reaction about Bobby being gay. Danielle actually wasn't surprised for some reason.

"That'd be nice," she smiled slightly at him. "I'd love to meet him. You come whenever, you hear? We'll go out and do something."

He hugged her and she only briefly tensed up, before he was leaving with a friendly wave at her.

John and Terry appeared then, sidling up to her sides and looking after to where Bobby had left, and apparently having been waiting for him to leave and giving him and Danielle privacy to talk in the meanwhile.

"I had _no_ idea that kid was a fag –" Danielle hit John's arm harshly and sighing in exasperation.

"Clean up your language," she admonished the two of them, rolling her eyes before turning on her heel and leaving them. "I'll see you later tonight, John!"

John grumbled and rubbed his arm, wincing a little. Terry shrugged at him.

"Well, we're not in the military anymore and hanging around the men," Terry snorted.

"Don't tell me I have to start talking around her like I'm talking to the parents," John huffed. "Come on now!"

Terry chuckled and halfheartedly swatted at his friend. "She _is_ a girl. We talk around her like she's one of the guys, but you know she isn't."

"She's easy to talk to though," John rubbed the back of his head.

Terry grew a little solemn. "Yeah, she is," he said, remembering their time together.

John stayed quiet, guessing what was up with his friend.

"I don't think she'll care too much about our cursing," Terry continued on. "Probably used to it by now. I doubt though, that she'll let us get away with the slurs."

"She'd beat my ass if I called her old man a slope," John quipped, grinning.

"I think she'd do worse," Terry smirked.

John nodded, growing thoughtful. He glanced at the other man. "In all seriousness though, we need to talk. About her. And you know…all this feelings shit."

"You like her, I like her," Terry said bluntly. "It's pretty straightforward. You just beat me to her."

"There isn't a beat-you-to-it thing," John scowled. "We both like her and she admitted she liked us both."

Terry perked up a little at that, unwillingly feeling a little hopeful.

"But she's still a little messed up from what happened and she still has to deal with it and we'll have to deal with it, and she said that it might even have to be something she'd be dealing with for the rest of her life," John told him.

Terry sighed. "We're not going anywhere."

"I told her that," John nodded. "Good to know we're on the same page."

"So?"

"I just…want to put it out there that we don't rush her or push her to choose, you know? She's got a lot to deal with and we don't want to add to it."

"What if she doesn't end up ever choosing? What if she just…likes us both?" Terry said suddenly, making John stare at him.

That was a possibility and if it wasn't addressed and put a strain between the three of them, it was going to add unwanted stress and problems.

"We could put that off and deal with it when that time comes," John started. "But I think you and I both know that if we wait until then, then we'll struggle and all of us are going to get stressed and upset by it, and it'll exacerbate Danielle's problems."

"So better to figure it out now so that we'll have an answer for Danielle if that time comes," Terry said. "Well, it's not like we both haven't said and agreed that the two of us were going to be by her side to the end and all. What fucking difference does it make to add that we'll both end up being with her like that too?"

"You okay with that?" John asked sharply. "Sharing her?"

"Are you?" Terry shot back.

They gave each other awkward looks in the end, their sharpness devolving into a more embarrassed and uncertain air.

"I mean, we're best friends and all," John clumsily said.

"But it'll be weird. Sharing her. Uh, yeah," Terry swallowed hesitantly.

"Isn't that what we've basically been doing though?" John mused, thinking about it. "We're not 'officially' dating her or anything. But these past few months with her and the way we've been living…"

"We're more or less a threesome already," Terry snickered.

"I ain't touching your gay ass."

"Fuck you, you motherfucker."

The two of them burst out into laughter and grinned at each other.

"Goddamn, John! Just get your dumb ass ready for tonight and make sure you treat Danielle out to something awesome," Terry pushed his friend towards the stairs.

"Asshole, it's still morning!"

"If you don't shut up, I'm going to kick you out of my mansion and keep Danielle all to myself!"

* * *

So while they weren't set and sure about anything, John at least knew that the three of them were going to be okay going forward and there weren't any hard feelings or issues involved with him going out with Danielle (and Terry himself probably scheming on taking her out sometime in the near future).

And maybe that diner he planned on taking Danielle to, while nothing special or fancy, would hopefully be a nice place for the two of them to go to. And the way Danielle was looking at him as she walked down the stairs in a pretty peach blouse and a gray ankle-length skirt swishing around with every move she made towards him, John would probably be a goddamn mess the entire time.

But even with all that, the shy smile and the sure look in her eyes (something he hadn't seen in so long, and yet he remembered seeing it long before when he was just this asshole to her and he fucking admired that look even then), he was glad he was seeing her like that and so like herself from before.

John was pretty damn lost in her.

Started 1/11/17 – Completed 1/12/17


End file.
